Porter is going to have a little brother. A partner in crime. A buddy to build train tracks with and drive matchbox cars all around the house.
I'll be totally, 100% honest with you. At first I was a bit... bummed. Before I got pregnant I really wanted to have another boy. I figured we'd have 3 kids, and I've always pictured us with 2 boys and a youngest daughter. But, once I was pregnant I realized what a wench I am when I'm pregnant and that I had kind of hoped that we'd have a girl so I could say our family was done, complete, and I didn't have to go through another pregnancy. And, furthermore, I'll admit I did mourn for a few days... I mourned for the daughter that never was, the daughter I wasn't destined to have at this time.
(I've always wondered why boys seem to be the "not as wanted" gender. But... I think its because that opinion is coming from us women (if you ask men... they all want boys). Boys are awesome, but every woman wants a little girl, a daughter, that she can relate to... to relive her childhood of playing dolls and barbies and dressing up as a princess with. Its not that I think girls are better than boys, its that I just want to experience that mother-daughter bond/relationship.)
I'm getting over that, getting used to the fact that I won't be shopping in any of the 53 racks of girl clothes at Target but the minimal 5 racks of boy stuff. Getting used to the fact that I'll be the mom in the bleachers cheering on her sons in their basketball games, and refereeing sleepovers with goofy, wild boys playing pranks on each other and giving each other ball shots. Getting used to the fact that I'll be the queen bee in this house for the next few years. And, who knows what is in store for our family. Maybe my boys will get to have a little sister to look over and protect sometime in the future. I think in a year or two we may consider adoption as I'm not sure I want to go through pregnancy again.
I'm also getting so excited to see this little guy. I'm thrilled that, so far, he looks healthy and happy and as cute as a little 2D baby on an ultrasound can look. I keep wondering if he'll look like Porter, or if he'll have Ryan's dark eyes rather than my and Porter's hazel eyes. Will he have dark dark hair like Ryan, or medium brown like Porter and I? Will he have my nose or Ryan's? Will he be a good baby, as Porter was, or will he be my hellion child? Will he be a talker like Porter or quiet and reserved? All those things just have me so excited to see him in May!
*and if any of you thought "girl" just because I voted that on the ExpectNet poll.... you must have missed my post yesterday where I said "I'll also give you a tip of advice... I did vote on the baby poll, but that vote may or may not be correct. That was my hunch."