Monday, November 19, 2007

Modesty? What modesty?

I was kind of chuckling when I read Katelyn's comment about how its so funny that I'm so comfortable talking about poop. Yes, that modesty just goes right out the window when you have kids. See... poop. At least everyone DOES that, right? Every man, woman and child poops (and if you don't, well.... you're either a liar or you have issues).

See, becoming a mom... these types of things tend to strip your modesty down to the bone.

I have:
  • Had a casual conversation with a nurse. As she inserted and held a catheter in me. Draining my bladder. For what seemed like an eternity (seriously.. it was like 5 minutes!)
  • Laid spread eagle on a bed with medical staff and family members in full view, as I grunted and groaned and pushed out all sorts of bodily fluids.
  • Had a doctor shoving his arm up in my uterus to retrieve any 'left behind' pieces of placenta that caused unstoppable bleeding
  • Had a lactation consultant groping my breasts and nipples, attempting to get Porter to latch on
  • Had nurses visit my room, ask to check my stitches- yes, THOSE stitches- and monitor "swelling and bleeding."
See... see the REAL glories of labor and delivery? Ahh, its a good thing those little miracles are SO worth it.


Leslie A. Collins said...

AAAAhhhhh....brings back way too many memories!!!!!! Too funny.

jenny cook said...

oooh, THOSE stitches sucked. eeeek!

Mary said...

Yeah those are memories I don't want to think about. Those catheters......first one drained blood for 20 minutes before anyone realized it. Second one went it fine. Third one stayed in for the duration of my hospital stay until about 10 min before I went home! Don't even get me started on the stitches. Getting the stitches hurt more than the delivery of the "moose" although my doctor seemed to think I was being a baby and said "I've already given you 3 Novocaine!" Well Dr. give me three freakin more cause it HURTS!!
Sorry for my long and full of attitude post. I have issues with delivery as you can probably tell. I don't think I'll ever be over it! It's a damn good thing my babe is cute and was a good baby:)

Kim said...

my husband still refuses to talk about what happened in the delivery room... too traumatized. :)

tracy said...

My favorite is when they ask you to roll over so they can "check your bottom." Yep, all modesty goes RIGHT out the window when you give birth!!